our seventh month..and counting.

not defunct. as yet.

fiskus

solo

lonely

sharing my life with you

Salaam

a few good reads.

what women want.

some's up

March 2006

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January 2008

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October 2008

December 2008

June 2009

Hello hello.

It's the end of the week...Sunday night to be exact. And i am blogging on a hungry stomach. All that thinking kinda zapped up the food i digested in my tummy. How queer.

Planning a trip to kl ain't easy,balls. Oh and Azman's tagging along. That idiot's not letting me go if i don't bring him along. So it's four girls (crosses fingers) and an indian guy. Hooray.

Please...i never want to work in the tourism industry where i have to sort out all the shit work in planning a trip. Can get pretty messy i tell ya! So annoying!
Ho wells.. i'm glad i landed myself with Cititel Hotel. Can somebody help me out on getting a rather cheap hotel in KL? any ideas?? somewhere along jalan sultan ismail or bukit bintang would do just fine. Cititel looks fine. Have yet to call them up tmr for further enquiries.

Then comes the transportation. Shiznitz this ain't easy. So people, you guys better make it k! I'm staying up (almost) all night just so we can have ourselves a smooth-sailing trip. hmph.

So from now...i urge you darlings to start saving up. We're on a budget i tell ya.


Alrightee now i'm heading to bed.. I'm glad things are fine now and yes, most importantly i'm happy with the way things are.
=)

And i got to lepaskan my gian rindu by calling Mul just now! yep yep. i called Myanmar..how cool shit is that uh??? been so long since i heard her voice...missed that booby friend of mine. And we...the loved ones left here with little boobs. =(

Ok i'm getting pretty random now so bye-bye.

Gooznaaaait!!!!!!!!!!

What a blast of a saturday. Alamak, forgot to upload the pics onto my laptop la. Malas want to get the mmc reader from sisters' room.
Nemind la..when im less tired i'll upload pics of me,atikah and safrina in a tudong k. how fun.


Anyhoos.
Just got back from Safrina's place. It was her late dad's 100th day tahlil. My goodness...it's been 3 mths or so since he passed away eh.. still remember that day like it was yesterday.
The very same incident that kinda blew the winds of change in my life..

So yeah after the tahlil, we had ourselves a feast.. Her sister can really cook la. By far the best lemak ayam cili padi besides my mum's.
=)

Before the tahlil, i met up with Atikah and we headed down to the expo halls to catch a glimpse of the malay wedding exhibitions. Keyword here is glimpse, but when i got there...i swear i couldn't stop squealing! The exhibitions were amaziiiiing. Nowsadays ah, the wedding dais are super extravagant ah, lucky people we are. Compared to last time's decor, nowsadays ones are so beautiful....made me wanna get married right there and then.

Can't wait to be a pengantin ya know..with all the royal treatment and special treats for that special day with that special someone. That's why, i pray everyday that i don't have to go through an arrange-marriage. That'll be super freaky to the max.

And so...Atikah and i shared equal sentiments about the bridal industry - we both have the same inclination with it. She asked me for a favor..to kindly ask Puan Fatimah Mohsin if she needs anyone for attachment assigments. Atikah wants to work for a bridal company during her internship period. Don't worry, i'll take full pledge advantage of my job nature and my clients. Ngyahahah.

While looking through booths after booths and being equally astonished at each one, i bumped into someone who brought such a pleasant surprise. Bumped into Nadia Cheong's cousin, Madia Suhana. Really, what a surprise! I mean, bumping into her la.. not surprised that she was there though.. and must say she's really tall in person. Haha. I swear, i felt like an ant. *shrugs*
But ho well, she's sucha nice lady.. so happy for her.. he big day's coming quite soon, next feb to be exact. And yeah, will help her out as much as i can when she needs it.
Ain't it nice to be able to help out lovebirds plan for their special day? awww....


Haiz.

I wonder when mine's gonna come. *giggles*

K lah you people. Right now, i put marriage aside first la. focus on money-making,balls!
then i can have the whole of singapore invited for my wedding. =p


I'm sleepy and rather tired. PQ's being a bitch. Gave her a sound pep talk just now that doesn't seem to work. Oh well. I'll just wash my hands off her for the time being. Teenagers and their growing up years accompanied by irritating hormonal-rage. It's annoying i tell you, especially since i'm slipping into my last teen year already.

-_-


Sial ah i'm turning 19 eh this year. My goodness. So fast??

Time never waits for you now, does it?


Freaky shit man. Next thing i know, i'll be twenty and hopefully, insyallah, somewhere in the map. Haha. Whichever map would do. Cos yeah...i am an ordinary girl with big dreams.

=)

Ok Gooznait!!!

I realise that life is so much better when you do fruitful things. Feeling productive is like the best feeling for me ; a feeling of achievement at the end of every tiring day.

As i sit here on my dining table with my laptop and my teddy bear, Charlie leaning on it.. i realise that i've come to just that.

Warning : this is gonna be long.

God knows,
i've always had problems with my finance. Felt like it was never enough..simply because, it was never my own money. Been living off my mother, so managing my own finance was the least of my worries.
Being typical, i always thought - if im broke, stay home and shut up la.

After a few brokenathan seasons, i realise...it's frustrating!!! to be cooped up at home not cos im lazy to go out or tired, but cos i hardly have a cent to my name.
And so my quest to land myself a proper job started. Proper job meaning, a job i see myself being with till i have kids or something.

Yeah, something like 9-5 and where i slog my ass off everyday just to earn that much money.

So then that was also when i adorned the hijab. And it wasn't easy eh, especially in metropolitan Singapore with only GCE Os. I swear, there were times when i just felt like attending interviews without it. But noooo. That small little voice in me said " Once adorned, forever adorned."

And im glad i have that small little voice inside my head. I'm glad it's that voice lah.

Then i tumbled upon urusan pengantin. An opportunity for me to earn an income with flexible working hours. And the job nature really suits me - get clients, arrange for appointments, close the deal, and i get my commission. Yes, it's commission based for now..but in time to come, i'll be having a basic. Which is good. It really is at my own grace.. and urusan pengantin God bless, is marketable. So i'm always in demand, alhamdulillah.

Which means, in the long run...i won't run dry.

Like today for instance - i stayed home the whole day lazing around cos i don't have any client meetings. So basically it's my off day lah. How fun kan.
And already next week, i have four client meetings over the span of three days - one of them being Puan Fatimah Mohsin (OMFG i'm so star-struck haha shiznitz).

I couldn't believe it, but i said it. I love my job. I love what i'm doing.


God knows, it's been tough. It's been real real tough. But God murahkan my rezki (alhamdulillah) and i believe, this is my way of repaying my elders.
And with so many other commitments, Azman's bandwith in my brain isn't as expandable as it used to be. I got other things to think about, bigger worries such as bills and my sisters' pocket money..don't get me wrong - i like it this way.. not worrying about Azman too much.
Cos then that way i can give him more space, and find better grounds for myself. whatever better grounds may be.


I have dreams. Big dreams infact. I don't want to live in mediocracy. I don't want a job, i want to make money, balls!
And thanks but no thanks, i don't get turned on by conventional business. I'm a lazy bum la!
You'll never see me running my business physically. I'd rather sit in the comfort of my own home and know that i'm sitting on income.
Sounds too much eh...macam paham sia Mira. But i swear, there is such a thing. With the internet la. Imagine if i could market something on the net. We're talking about the world wide web for goodness' sake. An untapped market can go a looong looong way,balls.

And since im an avid blogger, why not i do what i do best right? I have a network of my own already...right here, at meeracle.blogspot.com. =)

Who says you have to start big to earn big? Fuck that shit. Thinking big is the first step la, serious. You idiots out there might be saying aku angan-angan aje. Fuck! let me angan-angan lah rather than sit at home and live in mediocracy...




Actually kan, i don't even know what my point is.. just being random.

No, actually my point is...i'm heading to something big. BIG big. something u can do to. Cos heck, between me and you, there's no difference actually. I'm ordinary. Very very ordinary infact. Just that i dare to be crazy. If there's something out there that would make my stomach full and Insyallah earn me my living - for the family i'll mother - i say why not to it.

I'm giving it a shot.


If you do decide to check it out and am still unsure of what the bluest fish is going on, don't worry you're not alone. To be honest, I'm a new game player. And the keyword you should be looking out for is "Learn & Earn".
But if you decide that it's not your cup of tea and that it won't benefit you, then i'm so sorry for you.

www.meeracle.successuniversity.com


Life is a gamble. You never know when you hit it big.

Oh dear.

Where are you???!! Don't make me panic like this can?? I'm sorry. I'm sorry.






The next week's gonna be...the best week of my life. Insyallah. =)

Hello hello.

First up, shout out to Nadia - so glad you guys enjoyed your anniversary trip to phuket! i must say that i sincerely enjoyed reading that blog post of yours about the trip. The bapoks are the bomb and OH...MY....GOD. Sala Bua Restaurant?!?!?!!!!!
Hahaiiii of all the names in the world - for all you know it means something good in Thai. =)

And yes yes, i must must must check Phuket out before i ever get married. As in enjoy that place with my girlfriends la..the beaded shoes are to die for.

Thanks girl for the review. =)

##

I think that was the closest i got to seeing Phuket. haha. but you know what?? i'm in the mood for travelling suddenly. I'm going Umrah (Insyallah) in early June this year.. so before i embark on my religious journey, thought of letting off 'steam' with the girlfriends. No no, not clubbing or getting wasted and what not. Just simply being in the company of lovable girlfriends in another man's land. Wouldn't that be fun.

Kinda made plans for KL with Safrina,Atikah and Shazia. A weekend affair..something simple yet exciting. Sometime in mid-may. Mom gave green light and dad should be a breeze. Hehe.

But even after Umrah, i'm not gonna restrict myself from travelling. Ya, i think this is the most perfect time to go la..seriously. I'm not schooling and i'm already earning..still young, not rampant anymore, rather domesticated. So a bit of fun overseas wouldn't hurt.

Destinations i'd love to go before i settle down and become a mother of 10 :

- Turkey (go there and ogle at the belly dancers and go "Astaghfirullah!!", go to a restaurant and watch a man drink the Raaki and say "Haraaaam!!". Haha shiznitz i'm being ridiculous.

- Dubai. During shopping season would be good.

- Bangkok for some fine ass shopping!

- Langkawi (again) or Tioman for the beach and water sports when i need it.

.... And Barcelona would be saved for my honeymoon. =)


I pray everyday to get a husband who loves Spain like i do.

##

Anyhoos.

My days have been good, Alhamdulillah. Never been better. The sparkle in my eyes have come back.. and yes, i feel more youthful than i could remember.
Urusanpengatin is kickass stuff. And so i'm happy.


Suddenly i feel so free and liberated. God knows, i've been waiting for this for too long.


I am myself again.
*big smile*

Gooznait!!!

Hello hello.

I'm actually quite lazy to blog so this post would be rather short.
If you're asking me, the weekends have been rather weird.
Felt like it just zoomed past me.

Caught Turistas on saturday night with Saf and Tikah and Nas. Ok lah the show. I don't favor the genre.. but for a midnight show, my God was it worth the money. with all that spook.

Anyhoos.

Mr Lippy was a mistake. I admit, i admit. He was a mistake. Like how my sister questioned me ; how could i date someone else when my heart's with someone else?
Felt like i betrayed him or something.. but well you see.. the rut i'm in right now, isn't exactly a sane one. It's more senile than anything proper ; it's against all odds.

And yes.. being in this situation with all the faith in the world to circumvene it ; how could i have let just one (1) date cause quite a damage?

Both mentally and physically??

Already as troubled as it could get..I'm wondering : What's next?

What's next for me and Ali Baba?

Ho wells. =(

##

Am taking half-day off tmr to go fish out for another job. Yes yes, try my luck else where. If all else fails, i'll just stick to Fellus. Will be going with Nora.

Can't wait for the 30th! Iryan's 2nd birthday..meeting the Jalan Tenaga gang after eons. Kinda miss them and their rowdyness. Nonoi and Ajal and Palat and all will be there.. i'm going with Adib. I booked that bugger like 2 week's in advance man. He'd better turn up.

There's gonna be another wedding exhibition of some sort this coming saturday through monday at the SG Expo. I need to check the booths out. Hehe. Would be interesting..

And yes yes.
I'm out of ideas to rant about. Oh i hope Nadia and Ed enjoyed their anniversary trip to Phuket. I've never been to Phuket, balls!! wonder how it's like.
And i hope my fellow TP-ians had a fruitful time on their first day of attachment. Hmm.
And oh, i hope my Mul is doing fine. I miss her goddamit!!


Other than that, i love you. You know who you are. *grins*

On a friday night like this,

i wished i had my class 3 license..so that i could take mom's car out for a ride.

Beats me,
but i really feel like cruising along the SLE. don't ask me why the SLE, but i just feel like it.
Maybe cos the SLE is super old school.. and i can head up to JB via it.
Yeah..i feel like popping up to JB.

But i don't dare go in alone la.. JB's dangerous now. Could ask a friend along.. oh but that is if i had a license.

I just feel like cruising in the car, with sultry bhangra beats.. i am in my season of bhangra songs. Am crazy for them suddenly, dunno why.

Anyways.

Work was fine.
I'm worried..cos the moment i got home, i crashed for 2 solid hours..without even dreaming.
I was that tired.
And that's only working till 5pm tau. What if i've started and i still can't get used to the demand and timing??
Obviously i have to fall out from urusanpengantin. i can't juggle the commitments needed for two jobs.

I think i just need some super good exercise la. Thinking of heading down to the beach tmr or maybe just a good game of badminton with the sisters. =)


I'm giving this job a shot, i swear i want the money. But first, i have to get used to the energy level needed. I'm giving myself a week..to see if i am able-bodied enough.
Duh it's a simple task.. sit in the office in my own cubicle one whole day from ten in the morning till seven in the evening..
..but it's the calling and talking that'll zap up my energy..

Customer relations was never easy, always energy consuming tau.


So i can go on and on about the job..but at the end of the day,it's the digits. Really.
I've had enough of trying to like a job or adapt to it. For now, i have no choice.

##

I want to fall asleep again.. but after being too tired and skipping maghrib and 'asar, i have this funny feeling that i won't be able to fall asleep again.

AND THAT SUCKS.

Oh well...gooznait. I'll try sleeping. =)

Good morning Singapore!

It's 7 am on a Friday morning..and what better way to start the day than by ranting.

Haha.

I'm a born talker.. i just can't stop talking.

I crashed at 9 pm last night, and woke up at 5 am. How cool. Cool sia!!

It's been 2 years since i ever woke up this early automatically and felt so fresh.. i love this feeling.
I didn't know waking up early proved satisfying and peaceful..it really is rejuvenating.

And so i'm heading for my second day at work..and i really am excited about it.
New colleagues are just wonderful..and i can get to pray at work - all the better.

Like i said, now i understand why Azman sleeps early and all..
at the end of each tiring day after work, nothing else matters but some really good sleep! i'll get used to this la. And yes, we're so kental..we both knocked off at 9. How cool.


Nonetheless,
i need to prepare myself some breakfast - soya milk with wholemeal bread n butter.
After that, it's time to work!

=)

Have a good day ahead ya'll.

I am back home after a really tiring day at work.
It's been so long since i worked.. and so now i'm tired.

Now i understand, how difficult it is for people to have commitments while working..

I have no time and energy for anything else sia..except to come home and pray and eat!

Maybe i'll get used to this la..

Ntah eh.

I want to highlight on a comment Azman made on me yesterday.


He said that... I'm not indian-looking enough. -_- Somebody please please tell me he's either blind or stupid.
He must be kidding right?? Oh come on, i have the minachiest face ever.

I think Safrina would agree with me on that.

I don't get it..even when i asked my mom about it, she too says that i don't look too indian. Maybe cos i'm not "Anak Mami" ya know. And cos i'm mixed breed. My maternal grandma was purely indonesian. And my paternal grandma was malbari. So that left with my grandfathers being tamlek. Ok la,maybe not too tamlek la.. my maternal grandpa was a Poondicheri. And my paternal grandpa was a Chulia.

So basically my grandmothers contributed to my lack of indian colour. I'm not being racist, don't get me wrong..I do get disappointed sometimes with my mix. Not that i'm insecure, of course not balls! Just that sometimes, in a congregation of indians..i feel like im not one of them. And when im in a congregation of malays..i feel too indian around them. Sometimes, i feel like im neither here nor there.

My sisters and i came out forecasting different looks altogether. Sharrah's mistaken to be Eurasian sometimes (those dark Pereiras or DeSouzas) and PQ's often mistaken to be either Arab Saudi or Pakistani. WHAT THE HELL?!?!?

And my story's more dramatic. Back then when i was working at Harry's Mexican, i had my stupid customers thinking i was south american. One guy even explained to me why he thought so.. he said it's all cause i have high cheekbones, but small eyes...thick eyebrows, but small lips.. so now way in hell he thought i was south-east asian.

WTF?!?!?

haiya. the world and their ever-growing blindness.


So after being told i wasn't Indian-looking enough (thanks eh Azman!! if i ever get to mother your kids, atleast they have a chance at being fair you idiot!) , i nearly went bezerk.
Don't get me wrong, i'm not pissed off at Azman for saying that... i was surprised actually. And yes, i nearly went bezerk.. cos if i can't even pull off as being Indian, then my world would be torn cos that's the only thing i am...typical indian.


Ok lah you all.. i wanna go laze around after doing much housework just now. And oh, Hibbaki Remix is the bomb i tell you. When i have my own car..i swear i wanna install super woofers and blast out kickass bhangra beats. they're super syiokness i tell u.


Rafta rafta badhta hain dil mein sharaara
Qatra Qatra badhta hain dhadkan ka tara
Ba khuda... ba khuda...
Tujhpe qurbaan jaan
Tujhpe qurbaan meri jaan

Hibbaki Hibbaki - Hibbaki Hibbaki
Dilnashin - jaanashin
Hibbaki Hibbaki


Salaam Khudaafiz.

Hello hello..

Alhamdulillah, i have landed myself a job with Standard Chartered bank, doing direct banking. =) It's basically a telemarketing job whereby i call up prospects to sell the Stanchart Personal Loan Insurance. Ala nak kene call, call la...atleast it's halal money and a frikkin job. That's all that matters. Starting this thursday so hooray.

And thank you so much Karuna, for that really really thoughtful offer. I must say i'm so touched! Thanks babe, but FJ BENJAMIN?!?!?!!! No thaaaaanks cos the Melwani sisters are bitches. Oooops. Would i be charged for saying that?

Anyhooooos.

The day was spent well.. i was so so super duper pissed off early in the morning..i swear.. my blood like boil to farenheits like no other..
I spent the entire night anticipating the interview i had with Ms Tan Poh Cheng of ***** company, just to be rudely treated like a dustbin.
Whaaaaat just cos i left NAFA halfway, doesn't mean you can treat me like that during interview tau idiot.
She practically had me interviewed at the staff PANTRY.
thanks eh.

So after much dismay..and brokeness, i met up with Azman at Dhoby Ghaut.. He also ah.. idiot you know. He told me to meet him at Dhoby Ghaut, so i went up to the atrium la..infront of the 7-11 there. Then ah.. he called me, asking me where I was.. but he was already inside at the control station.
So i idiotically made my way down there to see everything except and indian man in shades with an italian goatee (hotness! -_- ).
Then,that's it. So binget frust tonggek madness piss ass off. Called him up yelling at him, and demanded he meet me where i was. Like don't make sense right?? Dhoby Ghaut has thousands of control station tau.. ya anyways so he met up with me..and we were both moody to the max cos we were Lapar bin and binte Kebulohs.

Headed down to Tiong Bahru for his CMPB appointment. It's good to know that he still asks me along for such trivial things. Ok la, not so trivial la cos it's the army matters..but it's nice to know that he's still bringing me along here and there..

And i swear, i spent almost all my day in a bus when we were done with CMPB. Went to the NTUC nearby to purchase tidbits for his fieldcamp till thursday cos that PIG likes to munch on snacks while on duty. No wonder dah gemok. But i like seeing him fat and chubby, instead of thin and sunken..like mat drug.
Makes me feel like i feed him well..and know that he's healthy.

Then after purchasing the items..we went to eat at the foodcourt nearby. He ah.. lapar mate you know. When he's hungry, he'll order anything that'll entice his tastebuds..even if it's more than his tummy could take. So in the end the food got wasted, and i scolded him for being so impulsive. In Africa, kids don't eat ok!

So we headed down to Nee Soon..not before we had to change like 3 buses.. but bus rides with a tired Azman was always boring. He'll stay quiet and just listen to me talk crap and in the end reply to me with total irrelevance to the topic i'm conversing on. Like when i was talking about transvestites and how the woman sitting infront of us looked like one, he replied, telling me that pigs have a sexual span of half an hour.

"B, you tau tak? Babi main stengah jam flat tau. Sedih eh."
"B, you know or not? Pigs have a sex span of 30 mins flat. Sad right?"

Azman...

1) It had NOTHING to do with transvestites.

2) I soooo didn't need to know that!!!


And then by him saying that, he got me imagining two pigs mating. And i slipped into disgusted silence.. -_-

##

So a very tired/worried/troubled/yawning (oh whats new) Azman, and I arrived at Nee Soon, and i parted for home.

And the day's weather in the North side of Singapore was weird as hell. The skies were practically grey. So dull.
I think it was cos of the pig's sex story. How sad.


Met up with Suad soon after to have our long-awaited catching up session..and then i went home,tired but happy.
Happy, cos i met Suad. Happy, cos i met Azman. Happy, cos i remembered that when i was eating, i caught him watching me eat and he smiled.
Happy...to know that even if it was just a minute, being with Azman is amazing..just as always.

He's crazy la! typical tamlek!


K lah people. I wanna go and sleep now. I have my firsy ever urusanpengatin appointment with Shima Bridal tmr. *crosses fingers*
I hope i can close my first deal. =)


And to Speranza.. who went to cut her hair.. i miss you. I'm sure it didn't suck, you're just being hypocrytical to your own hair. omg how sad la. i'm sure it's nice la you mamak.
Keling drama dasyat.
=D

K la k la. Gooznait.


I miss my Mumul..

You know what...?

After much patience, i finally got to upload the pics. Phew thank God!!

Ok so let's hit it.

Saturday was Nisa&Harry Day. Met up with the couple and had a nice chat with them...all the way till night time.
Being with them, i swear it makes me feel so super single. Hahaiii. Love you guys.



Ala caaaaayang dier.



Suhairy.



Khairunnisa.



Ameerah. (obviously not happy with the conversation on the phone.)



Yours truly.


I was daring on saturday. Wore the hijab like a sophisticated young lady..and i smoked in public as well! Ah what the hell who cares. It's McD's smoking section for God's sake.


##


Sunday was spent out with Shaziaaaaaa!!!!!!!! on such short notice, that crackpot agreed on meeting up. Headed down to Suntec just to be lost in circles for fun. Hehe. So so fun. Two gundoo girls in a metropolitan city.
So we walked from Suntec aaaaalllll the way to Boat Quay to have Shazia her maghrib prayers at the underground mosque nearby..
after which we settled our indian asses by the river...and talked...about lotsa sex. hahaiiii!!!!




us in the train on the way.



Shazia darling and I.



Friends since eleven.



Pout for the camera!



Peek-a-cleavage. uish.



We had a "who-has-a-longer-tounge" competition. I lost miserably. I bet you can see why....=p


So after a madness of a time by the river snorting and laughing and spanking each other, we decided to head down to clarke quay for starbucks. i needed my doze of oreo cheesecake! the bomb i tell you.



Mira starbucking.



Shazia starbucking.


And the day ended well with Dad picking us up and sending us home.. and Shazia's so cute, she actually asked "Uncle, you on weed ah??" when my dad purposely steered the car off course at 0.0002453 degrees. haha! so hilarious with that "im all innocent" face of hers.
I love that girl la. Missed her so much..and it's ironic that even after all these years, nothing really changed us. Only the digits. I guess that's how you spell friendship,eh?

##

Monday was a good day. Shitty start to the morning cos mum made me cry like a baby.. cannot tahan anymore la. pressure you know stay home, jobless!! you know what happened?? mum suggested me to pursue a course in spa & masseus and told me to look into it as a career. the first thing that came to my mind was seeing myself massaging an old apek!! how sad is my life gonna be if i'm gonna be working in a spa/salon with unhealthy males or females coming to me for a good shiatsu!!! u tell me!!

i was freaked out.

freaked out to a point, i started crying. locked myself up in my room and called azman. YES. Azman. i finally felt the need to pour it allll out. and he was helpful, he let me cry it out..and told me that i should start checking out the classifieds if i'd do anything about it. I swear, it's like a nightmare...to become a masseus.

And so i checked out the papers..and found a few interviews here and there.

After which, Azman promised to meet up with me to cheer me up. Oh come on. How cliched. But heck, he helped. He helped laugh it off, he helped also by laughing at me and how kiddish i became when i cried because of my mum's suggestion. he found it cute. haha. right!!!

anyhooooos.

Met up with him in the evening after he booked out from camp. He put on weight lah he. So fat already. The shirt he wore like so ketat already. Ew.







AzmanMira. =)


He's crazy, I'm crazy. That's all i can say. And we're meeting up tmr for lunch. He's got to go CMPB for a class or something and i can tag along. So yeah. That's exactly what i'm gonna do after my interview.

Hoping to get something out of this one.

Insyallah, Amin.

K lah ppl. that's it la...out of my socially-productive weekend. I want to hit the pillows now. Chiao.


Oh and by the way, he's harmless after all. And i had thought otherwise.

Was thinking of blogging about my socially - productive weekends but the connection on this mthfckg comp is testing my patience.

To upload photos onto my already flooded photobucket album takes centuries. Geram siallll.

Will upload on a better day.

Oh don't get me wrong, it's only the connection that's pissing me off. Other than that, I'm fine. Serious.

Alas,
no more investigations..no more interrogations..no more interviews with the Military Police or with any other Platoon Comanders.Shaan had better learn not to get into trouble again.
The hellish week is finally over, leaving him with at most 7 extra duties which include weekend confinement on 7 seperate weekends ONLY.
No detention barracks for him... no,no. He's not going to that horrendous place.

And Imran would agree with me, it was 'kerje bodoh' on his part. How stupid can men get sometimes?? Very.


Anyhooooos.

It's the month of April.. luck's not been on my side...still jobless damnit! But looking at the upcoming events i'm having for the month, i think i'll pretty much enjoy my April.
Kak Min's wedding on the 31st and Ayu's kid's birthday party on the 30th. OH! and Sonu Nigam coming to Singapore on the 29th. Ala...every fun thing's happening on month end. And im sure, if i have a job, month end would prove satisfying cos of payday.

damn it siallll i need a freakking job. i swear, im at the brink of giving up.
I'm not asking for much u know...just want office hours only...

any of u read Berita Harian on saturdays? i dunno what they call it on saturdays la..but whatever it is, be sure to check out Urusanpengantin.com's featured half-page ads in the papers today...ngyahngyahngyah.

I think i am in need of revamping my room and my weekends. I can't go on like this - bumming around. I feel so unproductive! Weekends are supposed to be spent with your other halves or something... but how to when he's always in camp???

so usually...i just stay home and look at my mom's face on saturdays and sundays...but i think im going bonkers la. With Imran's absence some more...

should i rather pick up a part-time job somewhere, to work on weekends too???

Oh wells...it's still very uncertain. I'm hoping for a better week next week. This one's been shitty i tell you.

I'm getting very random. I think i'd wanna go prepare lunch for the demonic sisters i house.
Toodles.

Today is such a gloomy day.. the sky cries with us.

It's a nice weather...i love days like these where i can snuggle up under my blanket while you all are out there working your asses off..ngyahahahha!!!

BUT WAIT.

It's you guys who are earning an income, not me.

Shit.

Well well... i seriously need an office job. Please, im at the brink of giving up you see. Is it my tudong, my qualifications, or just my luck???
Where else can i go to find a job eh... i'm running out of ideas, seriously.

On a better note.

I love someone so bad, he's a nutcase sometimes. He keeps screwing up and that's not good... God knows, i'm so tired. But as long as i still have my life at the end of the day...the rest is all up to God Almighty.

Down with the monthly female thing so can't pray. =(
In times when i need solitude, i'm stopped by a massive traffic of bloodflow.
But according to Souher, it's a prayer at heart that'll help the most now.

Am listening to No Me Dejes Solo while typing...and i just love the ambience in my room..oh did i mention? i'm alone at home so yaaaaahoooooooooooo!!!


The thing that's happening to me now, let's all just hope that things would turn out for the better and that i'll be granted the strength i need. Insyallah. Amin.

##

Hmmm...something tells me that a little bit of aromatherapy would be essential in times like these...but i have run out of scents. So forget it. And i'm suppose to call up certain people and start marketing the urusanpengatin.com business, but it's raining....so i shall procrastinate. heheh. how typical.

And now, i wanna bum around..and hope for a better day tmr.

Cheers.

Finally i'm rolling the ball again, balls.

I have been stuck at home. Stuck, cos i am not working as yet. And i hope the sideline income i can get from urusanpengantin.com will help sustain me.

My nights have been spent talking on the phone with Saf and Imran.. they've been great.

As you can see i am not really as enthusiastic as normal cos my start to the week was shitty.

Shitty i tell you, shitty!!!

Oh well let's not complain..
just go with the flow eh..

Go wherever life brings me la, don't want to talk much and complain. Heart pain only. Let's just choose to be happy, shall we? shall we? we shall.

Note to self : Life in a Hijab isn't that bad after all.. is more of a blessful blissful kinda road. But i assure you..it's challenging. Yes, and the word is challenging.


Speranzaaaaaaaaaa get me out of this you pretty lady.

I have a friend.

I have a friend who goes by the name of Speranza Solefa Mardaux Genieve. Don't get me wrong, she's purely local. PURE BRED EH.

Anyways.

What i'd like to say about this friend of mine is that,

she's the only one who'd dare wake me up just as i am about to fall asleep to fill me in with gossip...call me in the middle of the night and force me to entertain her till she grows sleepy and tired. And the word is FORCE. you hear me? good. =)

Speranza is a special being in my life. Someone so unique.. needless to say, my vocab is limited when it comes to describing her.

But then again i need to explain why i'm doing this ;

Cos there was this one night when she called me up and was reading my blog while on the phone with me and she did the most hideous thing ever - she read it out loud!
How embarrassing can it get for someone to read out ur entire blog post out loud while ur on the phone with them?? i bet my fellow bloggers couldn't agree more aye. it's like a harsh slap on the face tau. embarrassing u know. furthermore, she read with full of (sarcastic) expression!
terkene pulak blogspot jiwang.
hahahaiii.

Funny lah u Speranza. Chic with a hideous name. lol.


And so i promised her i'd write a whole blog entry just for her but seriously, i haven't the bluest idea what to write about.

Maybe cos knowing her has always been a pleasure and she's always touched me deep, words can't decifer what i have to say for her.
Oh yes and we could just sit side by side and just look at each other... i'm serious, no joke.
We do such freaky things to each other.

lol.

She and her ungodly sense of humour. She'll slap me hard when she's laughing or when i crack her up. Sad right... you made someone slap you just by making them laugh.


SO SPERANZA!!!

THIS IS FOR YOU EH MAKCIK!!! I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS. =)


Love you Saf.

You came into my life and took away all the pain, and you took back all the tears.
You uncried the tears and you shared with me something i've always wanted - your love. Your purest, most genuine love. You wiped away my sorrow and put back on my smile.

You made me smile again. =)

You undid the hurt and put back strength, you made me the woman i never thought i could be.

It's where life brings me at the end of the day, it's how unfair it can be.
How seemingly challenging each step i take, makes me the woman i would be.

You've made it come true.


Alamak touching nyerrr!!! macam nak puke gitu kan baca ni. But alahai, i'm on cloud nine la seriously.

You're amazing lah you idiot!
And i love you for that. Hmmmm.

Why i like so jiwang ah tonight.. because right, i have someone who's about a few tens of kilometers away from me (to be specific in Malacca) who's missing me and can't stop calling me out of the bluest reasons. I miss him too, and i can't wait to meet up with him tmr and see what he got for me at Malacca.
He went there for a wedding and he said that there's this road at Malacca called Jonker Rd or something, and he accidentally pronounced it as "Johnie Walker" Road infront of his mother.
Ooops.

He can be a klutz sometimes, i swear.

But he's just so cute and insatiable the way he is..and that's why i love him. So lovable and adorable.

Shaan you genius.

Anyhooooos.

I'm gonna go get some sleep (smiling).

Heheh. I'm happy, once again.

It was a good Good Friday.

Spent the day well with PQ, Saf and Tikah. We headed down to Dhoby Ghaut to catch Meet The Robinsons and we discovered that we haven't watched a single movie together (as in me,saf and tikah) in our whole friendship of three years. hahaiii how ironic eh. But heck, virgin movie-date or not, we had a fantabulous time watching the show didn't we?

The movie was good..i'd give it a rating of 7 stars. Giving them credit for the visuals and graphics. Being an art-student, i can't help but notice that the illustrations were fantastic. Nonetheless, the action sequences still haven't beaten The Incredibles..maybe cos they differ in genres. All in all, it was a good movie with an interesting story line. Thumbs up.

Oh, and you should see our faces before the movie started, just when they showed a short snipet of an old-school Mickey Mouse cartoon. Hahaiii! priceless la our faces. we thought we paid a whooping $9.50 for an old Mickey Mouse cartoon or got ourselves into the wrong theatre. Saf was already panicking,kan? hahah.. and i was like " Takkan lah orang nak bayar mahal2 stakat nak tgk bende ni siak."
Alas, i was right. It just ate about ten minutes of the showtime. PHEW.


So we headed or rather, walked all the way to town from dhoby ghaut..and we enjoyed being among the busy and metropolitan human traffic. i was bloated with the LJ dinner we had before we caught the show so i was strutting around town in a hijab looking pregnant. Such a pity i wasn't wearing a ring, or ppl might really think i was pregnant! Yes, when it comes to Safrina and Atikah, nothing satisfies us better than to walk from one place to another. We have strong legs, don't worry. =)


Didn't bring along my camera so sorry there won't be any pics. But if Tikah could upload the pics taken on her hp then it would be much appreciated. =)

Highlights of the day -

1) Safrina made friends with the Queen of Transvestite,Munaji aka Jia. Hahahaiiii. Saf and her overbearing sense of curiosity making her all friendly. Well actually, it was the size of her earrings (the ones she bought in bangkok the other day) that caught Jia's attention. How cute. They even exchanged numbers!! Yes yes, that Munaji who was once upon a time a boy acting in Aksi Mat Yoyo.

2) I saw Umar and Diyanah, the Healthwise members. And the best part was..Diyanah was wearing a hijab, just like me! You see..it was such a wonderful sight cos just like me, they were clubbing animals too. Week in week out without fail seated at the VIP lounge at Momo. Umar was like the King of Momo with his never ending VIP privelleges and whatnots, and Diyanah was always by his side as the doting gf. She used to dress in killer hills, chaos skirt and a super skimpy piece of cloth just enough to hide her boobs.. Umar is one of the high-ranking people at Healthwise and so he has himself a sporty Celica, so he'd be rolling it around..hanging out with big names like the son of the owner of Far East Organisation. And it was in his Celica that Azman and i had fond memories with. =)
It was Umar who saw most of my mad moments at Momo, when i was still clad with a corset and almost all the time high/tipsy. Spewing nonsense while at it and he saw me being frustrated at Azman outside Devils Bar once.

Oh my... so now seeing that lovely sight where i was sure the both have changed, (just like me) i couldn't help but be taken aback and smile...
I regret not coming up to Diyanah and giving her a hug, embracing our feminity thus far. Maybe cos i was however pleasantly shocked. Well, i have her number so i shall text her sometime tmr. She and I never stepped on each other's toes so i didn't see a reason why i shouldn't approach her just now...well. Next time then eh.


Ok lah you all. I'm tired and tmr's saturday. i have a maulud to attend at Habib's. Dunno what time i shld be there though...
...till you here from me again. Toodles!



ps: And to my darlings...i sincerely enjoyed my day with you guys...much love.

You've been good, you've improved. Keep it up, boy. It's better this way. I like this. hehe.

I realise..

Things change. And people change when things change.. and people change things, and things change people.

How ironic, this force behind change..

Like i said before, i say once more.
It used to be the six of us.. but now, it's like we've all changed..'grown and sexy'.


Here's to us.




##







Goodbye Meerwan, Goodbye ManMira.




And we..the last ones standing.. the times were too good to last ; the party's over.

Hello hello...

thought of sharing with you the latest pics i took when i was out since monday.. seriously, i've been going out everyday since monday and it's tiring balls!!

Anyhoos..

Monday was spent job-hunting which turned out to be fruitful.. time spent with my darling Atikah was fabulous!! i love you tikah!!




Atikah and me.. =)




This is such a good agency. Promising and very very helpful. Thank you.





Check this out!! They have an online portal whereby i could fill up my application and it goes straight to their database..how cool.




Atikah smangatjubo. heheh.




Mira flowerpower!




Kesian, this mynah bird botak... kesian kan...
(Imran saw this pic and said that it's a baby vulture. wtf, i knowww.)




After hardwork, nothing kicks ass like a good ol' teh tarik at Mughal's!




Our teh tariks. hmm-mmmm....


Then the rest of the day was spent at Parkway Parade where i met up with Nisa and Harry...

##

Today i went to Shaw Centre for the interview...oh by the way i rejected the customer service job cos of the timing, wasn't suitable for me. Well it's good that i was honest to my interviewer and was told that i'd be contacted about the bank teller job at ABN AMRO. coolness shiznits!!


Imran was with me the entire day...aw how sweet, that steady of mine. hahahaiiii!!! After strutting around town, we headed down to Bugis to meet...The Big Man. The brother we've not met since 2 years ago, a friend we kept dear to our hearts....Skye.

Yes yes! finally we met up with good old Skye, and we had ourselves a blast!






Waiting for Abang Skye by the fountain.

Imran and i agreed that people watching is sooo super fun. Especially when it's me and Imran. you can imagine the amount of laughter generated with the kinda comments Imran could come up with. hilarious madness i tell you. Imran you idiot! always cracking me up.




See? this poor apek fell asleep waiting for his loved one. hehe






Nice shots by the mad duo.


So when we met Skye at the taxi stand, our hearts were pounding aggressively against our ribcage. And there he was...not anything lacking, glowing and serene - the familiar sight of a big brother, Skye. How long has it been my friend?? Too long i suppose.. but it's great to have the chance at meeting you and spending time with you again, just like old times..
Clad in white, looking healthier than ever, he muttered a "I'm shivering sia seeing you guys.. I missed you guys.." and i embraced him, with that came a swell of emotions unspoken. Skye!! you're back!!

Oh well.. then we headed down to traditional budgeted cheap good-tasting food at Tong Seng where Skye blanje, and my oh my it was so nice to be able to catch-up. And even Skye said i looked good in a hijab. He was so happy i was in one.

After dinner, we headed down to Starbucks to chitchat over coffee and everything nice..





Imran and Skye. How long has it been since they were seen together??





Skye and myself...just like old times huh.





Our oreo cheesecakes and drinks, sponsored by the Big Man himself. Many thanks dear one. =)


Then it was time for us to depart for home.. and we had ourselves a blast recolleting the past..hahaiii!!!






As we waited for the train. btw, doesn't he look so much younger?? he was flattered by that fact, esp when we said he looked like an art student. he really does!! hahaiii!!





Last shot for the day - Imran,Mir,Skye.


This one was funny cos we were looking for someone to snap this pic for us..and Skye being SKYE, approached a man from the other side of the platform and told him, "Excuse me, could you please take picture for us? I'm from Malaysia and these are my friends ah. Thanks ah." .

Tak abes-abes! Prangai tak berubah sia Skye! hahaha...! He was the man responsible for "UNCLE, NEWTON WHERE AHHH???".

I had to remind him of that incident, and that sent him cracking up in fits with the familiar laugh-out-loudness.
His laughter never changed not one bit. Hahaiiiii.


Skye my friend, it was so nice too you again.. We missed you, we really did. And im so glad that even after all these years you weren't around, you still remembered us and cherished us, the way we cherished you.. you the man! we love your company and we're so happy you're back with us.. we missed your antics and your care.
And before he alighted at Aljuneid, he said that familiar "Ape2 call me tau. Ape2, callll.".
Oh man i missed him saying that... it's been eons since i heard someone say that and truly mean it, knowing i could count on him for that..

Alas, me and Imran has ourselves a good day..before that idiot of mine lands himself in camp for THREE WEEKS.
yep, 14 days S.O.L and another 7 days at Standby. Sometimes the army can suck, but hell that's where they groom the boys to become men.

I'll miss my Imranjeng. But atleast i know, he's just a phonecall away..


So i shall hit the pillows now.. meeting Habib tmr in the morning for the "mandi bunga" session. Insyallah all goes well. And Insyallah ABN AMRO gives me a call tmr. I really want that job.


Ok ya'll. gooznait.


ps: And to that special somebody who likes to read my blog with full of expression, i will blog about you on a seperate night ok? tee hee. till then, try to sleep soundly. you gundoo. love you! heh!

God and His wonders.. really.

These past few months i've been struggling to look for a job. And today, Alhamdulillah, i landed myself an interview with a customer service opening!!

What happened was,

i had this really itchy itch.

- to be a customer service officer,

- to work in a bridal company,

- to experience working in a bank.

GATAL KAN AKU.

Like all three are totally different sia. And who would thought i would be given a chance for all three you tell me?

But but.

I received a call from Mr Faaiz at 0930 hrs yesterday after sending in my resume for urusanpengatin.com, and he has employed me! i followed him for a client meeting yesterday at Chantique Spa just to see the job nature of a sales personnel for UrusanPengantin. So basically it's a bridal advertising company.

One bird down.

Then then right..

I received a call from Fiona at Adecco, asking me to come down for interview at Shaw Ctr for a customer service officer opening just now. And i'm scheduled at 3.15pm.

One more bird down.

And just as i hung up on Imran after telling him the great news that i've been scheduled for an interview (alhamdulillah), i received a call from Debbie Adecco, asking me if i'd have interest in working as a bank teller for a european bank.

BALLLS!!!!

that's it! i've killed THREE birds with one stone!!!

Alhamdulillah Maha Syukur Allah.. i'm so happy with the job opportunities.. and i already thought that there's no way in hell i'd land myself a job especially in a hijab.
But u see,i never gave up and i believed that He the Almighty would grant me rezeki. Alhamdulillah!!

So now i'm torn between the customer service job and the bank teller one cos im doing urusanpengantin.com as a sideline, freelance sales consultant commencing my job next week. I'll see which of the two would suit me better, and Insyallah God will bless me with this grace.. I'm so happy, i swear.

Finally, a job i want and can hold on to. This is not only for me, but for my family and my future.

Amin.

This is for a loved one.

This feeling, what is it? It's not a state of confusion anymore, that i know. My heart feels heavy thinking about us. About what we were, how we were and where we will be going..

This time around, i feel like it's time for me to finally take my flight. I feel it weakening, this love i have for you. I understand you. I do.. even when a part of me lacks it, i always reassure myself and understand you. I've been very comprimising.. very patient and tolerant. But somehow i feel like it's not right doing this.. loving you, it's not right. It's against a certain kind of energy.

I don't know why i suddenly feel this sudden change. It's so sudden, really. It's like half of my heart has become a brick ; i have no affections anymore. Don't know why i'm saying this but i'll miss you. I think finally... it's best for me to leave.

Leave you, leave us for good. Whatever structure we've built for the past three weeks or so.. i leave it to you. The ball's in your court. Do whatever you want with it.. cos i finally can't be bothered. Not that i don't see it as worth it, just that i think i need to take a break. A forever break from you.

Ali Baba, i need you to let go. Please don't say that you love me. Love isn't everything. Yes - it's a strong element, a strong force driving the both of us - but it doesn't bring us to the end of the day.

Ali Baba, i need you to free me a happy woman, bless me with this freedom. Erase all the memories and happiness. Leave me with the sorrow so that i can learn from it and in hope shape up my life if you really are the fulcrum of it.

It gets tough when there's feelings involved eh. Shitness siak.

Sometimes in life,

you don't deserve things that happen to you ;
and you deserve things that don't happen to you..


Sidetrack :

I want to work in a bridal company. I believe working there proves to be satisfying and i need to know how to go about doing that.

Because one day,
I will have my own dream wedding to think about.

Hello hello..

So i was wrong, weekends aren't THAT boring after all for me. Managed to go out on Sunday and won myself a fruitful day. =)

First up, was town with Wany.. yes yes the glory of meeting up an old friend and catching up with the lastest juice. But my coloured contact lenses have expired i think , making my eyes tired and heavy by 5 pm .=(

Late lunch at Cahaya proved to be satisfying..Ms Wany was craving for the smell of the place and the food since forever i think. And as for me, i'll eat whatever that's there. Heheh.
Talked and talked, like old times..but she was in shock (in a good way) the first time she saw me in a hijab. And i didn't feel funny nor weird at all. It might only be a twenty dollar hijab, but it's the attitude that's really priceless.

Anyhoos..
After Cahaya, we summoned our aching feet,lazy beings and heavy stomachs to Wisma for some window-shopping. Proved to be heartaching cos Warehouse was having a sale and the items were amazing. Wany and i agreed that Topshop/Topman isn't even worth the money. Seriously, their material is so "blah". Stepped into Lacoste and saw better quality shirts and whatnots, and i think i'll be making more trips to Lacoste for my Ali Baba when i have earned my bout of income.

After much heartache and all, we headed down to Shaw Centre Mc Cafe for some chilling and unwinding...



The girlfriends. =)




Mas Hazwani - we've been friends since 2 years and counting now..nothing's changed anything.




Wany looks cute here and i look like her aunty. =p




Nestled in our cute little spot at the smoking area when none of us was smoking..kinda space-wasting but heck, we fully utilised it. Heh.



I know, so sidetrack but this is my new lovely skirt..the one i bought in Langkawi. I love it more than anything else in the world right now..


##

So after snapping a few pics...we finished the drink and headed to Topshop in the upper level of Shaw Centre where Wany got herself a pair of really nice earrings. I hope that made her feel better..sometimes buying urself something amidst tough times proves therapeutic. =)

Then we took the bus home, and Nisa called me when i was at Mcpherson estate. Joined her and Harry at Parkway Parade at the usual spot, and sat there till ten..
The couple were working the next day and i had a curfew..so it's all good. Talked and talked..and they were really happy for me, seeing me in a hijab. hahaii! it's always nice to catch up with friends esp close ones after a long brawling week, no?

Headed home soon after only to catch the Zee TV Cineawards show held live at Genting Highlands. It was awesome...the performances were fresh and electrifying, and my most fav was Aish's "Crazy Kiya Re" item. Not only was that my favouritest song, the whole dance item was fantastic. The show was supposed to end at 2am but they dragged it till 3! so halfway through the very important award-receiving (eg: Best Female Actor Award!!!) the satelite decided to be a bitch and stopped telecasting. how rude right! So now i stayed up all night..knowing who won what in whichever awards, except the heroines!!! argh damn u ZEE TV for being so cheapskate.

Anyways,will check it out through the net la. And so to say, Karan Johar talks alllllot. Hearing his voise as the host the entire night kinda got me "terbawak-bawak" him into my sleep. Uish so freaky.


K lah ppl...i gotta go now. It's time for a proper jobhunt today. Yes, i'll make it proper today. tee hee=)
Have a cheery monday ya'll. bye!



ps: the new fragrance for women from Issey Miyake is to die for. I'm getting it once i have cash damn it. hahaiiii!!!

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