our seventh month..and counting.

not defunct. as yet.

fiskus

solo

lonely

sharing my life with you

Salaam

a few good reads.

what women want.

some's up

March 2006

April 2006

May 2006

June 2006

July 2006

August 2006

September 2006

October 2006

November 2006

December 2006

January 2007

February 2007

March 2007

April 2007

May 2007

June 2007

July 2007

August 2007

September 2007

October 2007

November 2007

December 2007

January 2008

February 2008

March 2008

April 2008

May 2008

June 2008

July 2008

August 2008

September 2008

October 2008

December 2008

June 2009

I had a date with this guy very recently. He made me so high i could fly. But the thing about this guy is, he's unselfish. He gives, but he never takes.

Or so i thought.

This clandestine relationship i'm having with him is forbidden. Sinful. Sacred.

It's been so long since i last met him. And everytime i do, it's always euphoric initially..then gradually it turns disastrous.

He brings out the vice in me. At first, he'll make me feel like the queen of the dancefloor, the animal of the party, the livewire of the congregation. Then he'll kick into me..he'll slowly make his way up to my nerves..and eventually numb me.

It this thing called locked-in syndrome. That's exactly what he does to me.

I can't say i hate it. I'm ashamed of it. I'm ashamed of having myself see him time and time again. When i know his biggest fear is my very own willpower.

Just maybe,darling, i won't have to see you anymore. Won't have to digest you and make you part of my bloodstream anymore.

After all that's happened, i daresay my willpower is only getting stronger. My resistance against you is fuelling. You can't stop me. And nobody can tempt me into having you.

You are the devil in disguise to the world.


fyi : this ain't a love story.

You know,

I don't say this too often, but i do get flattered when i find out that people are jealous of me. Truth be told,there's nothing i have that others don't have. Ok fine,you wanna talk about the things money can't buy..then those are for me to keep. But if you're talking about the materialistic things, well..i wouldn't say i have the best stuff/wardrobe/bag collection to show off to the world.

I'm modest, and to start off with, i don't get jealous of people. I understand humanity has a whole and our ability to possess very different things in life. No 2 persons in the world are similar, everyone's unique in their own way.

So it brings me to this post..

I seriously don't understand people who get jealous of others..and find satisfaction in defaming the ones their jealous of..what's worse is, they won't even admit that they're jealous and fuming with envy!!

My goodness, no wonder they say women are the easiest to win a place in heaven, as well as a ticket to hell.

Oh well.

-In loving memory-

Saikh Abdul Kader , beloved..

Father

Husband

Brother

Soccer enthusiast

Uncle

There will never be another you.

May Allah bless your soul and lighten your burden in your new world. Peace be upon your soul,Dear Uncle. Rest well.

Ameen Ya Rabbal Alameen.

" Hasbi rabbi jhalallah

Malfi qalbi' ghairullah

Nur Muhammad shalallah

-

Subhaanallah

Wa Alhamdulillah

Wa laa ilaaha ilallah

Wallaa hu akhbar

Subhaanallah "

What's been happening :

1) Started with the Shangri-La Hotel,Singapore on Monday 7th April with the Reservations department.

2) Been very very very super duper whopper occupied with work ; long hours and demanding job scope. By the time i'm finished with work, i'm brainfucked. And not to mention the amount of time i spend on travel to and from work.

3) My uncle, is in critical condition right now. So the days (since yesterday to be exact) have been rather depressing. Spent the night at SGH last nite with my guy cousins around, paid my last due respects to that wonderful man of ours and i feel better today.

4) Honestly, when i received the news abt my uncle slipping into critical condition and being heavily sedated..i could feel glass breaking under my temples. And when Shafi mentioned, "He'll be sleeping till the very end.." I just couldnt' fathom anything more surreal and hopeless than this.

5) Trying to organise another 4F reunion with the crazy secondary sch bunch, IF we all can actually sacrifice a night of our lives for ourselves.

6) I like the way my life is as a routine - no complains so far.

7) Must learn to let go, the good ones leave early.

8) My hair is growing longer, i think (hope,too).

9) What else is new eh?

10) I guess that's about all the highlights i can whip up rite now, under immense shortage of sleep - only 8 hours in a total of 48 hours.

A breakdown of my past 48 hours : 8 hours of sleep, 13.5 hours of work and 4 hours of travelling to/from work. The rest is well, i don't know.

Oh and not to mention 2 packets of cigs for the past 2 days. That's 40 fucking sticks.

##

Mum's having a problem with the 3rd floor neighbour. She's jerked about the fact that the family (a malay one to add to that ) passed some very unfriendly comments.

Anyhow,
it seems like it's going to rain.

And i need to catch up on my sleep.

So till you hear from me again, this is girlwonder (As kickass as ever) over and out.

ps: excuse the narcissm.







And so i feel so fulfilled being of help to others. Knowing that i could be relied upon,makes me feel grrrreattt.

So i just recovered from fever..something that's been absent from my life for about a year.
I shan't publish my idea here,not now atleast.

Atleast when i have all the structure and intended duration sketched out,then you'll know exactly what i'm talking about.

Right now i'm pretty random. Pffft it frikkin two thirty on a friday morning.

Mr Brisbane is a nice guy. He laughed when i said i was once James Bond. =)

Jamie Scott & The Town's accompanying my through this lonely night of mine. I have tons of things to do online. Sort out the mails, online portal and such. Oh and job hunting on behalf of a sound asleep Safrina.

The things friends do for each other. =) (I love you,that's why.)

I'm done with her resume and cover letter. Back to her for final editting,if any is needed.ngyeheh.
I really want that woman to get a job she'd love. Then that means i'd love it too,rite? But i shall savour her jobless state right now before the new job robs her of time and energy. Then that's minus Safrina-Time in my life. No,that's not good. =(

Well what do we know, we're hitting 20 already.

Balls.

What gets me going,gets me talking. What He brings me to, He brings me through.

Twenty
elegantly bolder&badder
INSANE.
fake and dismissive

travel.gossip.girls&boys.

Dibs
Mul
Souqie
Rina
Frinn
Nadirah
Ben Tricheks
Farah Faith
Karooona
Online Album
My Profile

and i fly again.