Seems like it was yesterday,when i saw your face..
you told me how proud you were,but i walked away.
If only i knew...what i know today.

I would hold you in my arms, i would take the pain away.
Thank you Ba,for all you've done..forgive all your mistakes.
There's nothing i wouldn't do to hear your voice again..sometimes i want to call you,
but i know you won't be there.

I'm sorry for blaming you,for all the things i just couldn't do.
And i've hurt myself by hurting you.

Would you tell me i was wrong?
would you help me understand?
are you looking down upon me?
are you proud of who i am...?

There's nothing i wouldn't do, to have just one more chance.
To look into your eyes...and see you looking back.

##

This is the night i realise how much my mother loves him.
For 20 years,
all the pain,
all the hurt,
all the abuse,
doesn't erase the love she has for him.

The amount of love overwrites it all..
God's greatest gift, the gift of love.
The love of a wife.
So loyal to her husband..the man she's devoted her entire life to.

Ummi, when can i see you smile again?
When can i see the happiness, the pureness of this sanctuary called love?
This has broken us,
this has shattered me..
I am changed because of this..
I swear, all i want is peace and happiness for this family.

All i want, is for Ummi to be happy.

"I have all the money in the world, all the strength to keep me going for the
past 20 years. But i am a woman Meer, i need my husband..I can't live alone.."
"I have suffered enough...I've gone through alot..I don't know if i can take this,
i don't know if i can go on..."

If this is God's way of making me realise,
if it is in my power to help him change,
i would sacrifice anything in the world for the better..

This is my test.
My own battle to fight.
I swear, this is painful.
I am changed because of this..

I am just a child, dear Lord.

"Can you sleep tonight, knowing he's out there in the streets
without anyone, or anywhere to go?"

"Kau sampai hati ke Meer, tengok bapak kau macam gitu..?
Biar ape pun, die bapak kau jugak..."


Ba,
I didn't mean for any of this to happen.
I swear, all i wanted to do was surface the truth,
and make you realise that it's time for change.

You owe me my childhood.
You owe me my mother's happiness.
And i owe you an apology for putting you so low.
You owe me a childhood, erase all the torment and abuse.
Do away with that temper,
cos underneath all that..is a man i look up to
as a father.
A man i'm so proud to shoulder,
a man i love.

For now, all i can do is pray for your safety and for your return.

Cos this isn't a home, if you're not here.
It's incomplete.



Ampunilah dosa-dosaku.
Kembalikanlah, bapaku.
Tabahkan hati ibuku..
dan rahmati lah ibubapaku...

amin..



alone and afraid, May God help you through the night.